First Date Etiquette & Rules – Men & Women’s 1st Date Rules

First Date Etiquette & Rules – Men & Women’s 1st Date Rules


A first date is important and helps those involved get to know each other. It is important to put into consideration some of the during and after first date rules of engagement i.e. the first date etiquette for men, women as well as first date rules for men and women. If you want to try a kiss, know first date etiquette for kissing. Some of these are gender based while others are general as may be seen below. 

First Date Etiquette for Women

First date etiquette for women can make everyone happy or make the big difference i.e. whether you will be asked for another date or not.

Keep Time: Getting to the agreed venue late may convey disinterest or a lack of respect for the man. If by any chance you cannot make it on time, call and give reasons why. You should also not arrive too early as this will indicate eagerness or desperation.

Switch off the phone: Interruptions caused by phone calls, email and social media notifications can be quite distractive. Keep your hands off your mobile device so you can give all the attention to your date.

Dining etiquette: Ensure that you observe basic table manners. Don’t chew food too fast. Eat at a pace that is close to that of your date. This will help avoid instances in which you finish food too soon or too late in comparison with your date.

Avoid placing your elbows on the table as you eat. When you have to talk, do so with no food in the mouth. Nothing is such a turn off as semi-solid food popping out as one is talking right in front of you.

Dress appropriately: One should dress to impress for the first date. The dressing style adopted should be respectable. Dress sexy without getting scanty. Show as little flesh as you can. Be comfortable in what you wear.

When doing makeup, have it subtle. Too bold makeup may distort your appearance or make you look like a clown. Get a professional makeup artist if you may to help you wear the right makeup for the occasion.

Have some table manners: While eating, it is important to observe some dining etiquette. Ensure you chew food at a moderate rate and swallow food before speaking. Elbows should never be placed on the table when eating.

There are many other first date etiquette for women as well as rules which might vary depending on the particular society you are in or region. It is therefore very important to ensure you know them and put them to practice.

First Date Etiquette for Men

Men have a little more responsibilities to fulfil on a first date than women since they are the ones asking ladies out most of the time. Some of important first date etiquette for men include the following:

Timeliness: Get to the agreed venue of meeting five minutes before agreed time. This will give tan allowance for you to be available to receive her when she arrives. If she arrives before you, she might get stranded which will not be a good way to kick off the date.

Classic male etiquette: While with the woman, be sure to open the doors and yield the seat for her. This when done in the right way will serve to charm her and show her that she is appreciated. Ensure you settle the bills even when she offers to help. Any woman will appreciate the chivalry but it ought not to be overdone.

Keep your hands off her: The first date should serve for the two to know each other. Restrain from inappropriate touch. A kiss on the cheek is okay but a lip locking one should be avoided.

Be courteous: Ensure that you treat your date and any other people you encounter with respect. This will ensure that a positive first impression is created.

Switch off your phone: This way all your attention will be on her and you will not be rudely interrupted by the ringing.

After First Date Etiquette

The ladies should text the man and thank him for the great time they had together. The text should be non-committal. This will help avoid a show of eagerness or desperation. It should be drafted in such a way that it would still be relevant even if nothing else was forthcoming

The man should make a follow up call the following day. Here he should be frank as to whether he would wish for a second date. If not, he should tell the lady in a kind way that their outlook in life is different and as such they can’t make any progress.

Being frank will be courteous than ignoring a person totally. A cold treatment is unkind and will only earn disgust from the lady.

First Date Etiquette Kiss

Like discussed earlier, take things slow when it comes to kissing. The only kiss allowed is one on the cheek when meeting and parting. This will be less offensive and is likely to be more appreciated than the rest.

First Date Rules for Women

Other than practicing basic etiquette when on a first date, there are various dos and don’ts that one ought to bear in mind. These are:

  • Always carry cash with you. One can never tell when something could go wrong. Having cash will help take care of the bills if your date expects you to go dutch. It will also come in handy in cases of emergencies.
  • Do not get drunk. The first meeting should be when you get to know each other. It is no time to show how well you can gulp a number of beer bottles. A glass of wine would be okay. If you have to take alcohol, do not get to the point of intoxication. Keep it minimal.
  • Never speak about marriage and children on the first date.

First Date Rules for Men

  • Be yourself. Trying to be someone you are not will make it hard for the two of you to understand each other. One can never put up a show for too long before their true colors show.
  • Be the one to pay for the expenses. Don’t allow her to pay the bills on your first date even if she offers to.
  • Do not talk about your previous relationships. This may make your date think you are not over her.
  • Walk on her outer side and take strides close to hers. This will give her a sense of protection.
  • Offer her your hand on steep steps

After First Date Rules

  • Keep it away from social media. After the first date is not the time to post whom you went out with. The other party may not like.
  • Every person should go to their home. This is not the time for sleep overs.
  • The man should be the one to make the first follow up call.

These rules and basic etiquettes will go a long way in determining what comes out of the first date. While they are not the only determining factors, their role in building a strong foundation cannot be under estimated.

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